Humor! Humour!


Actual Want Ads

2 female Boston Terrier puppies, 7 wks old, Perfect markings, 555-1234. Leave mess. 

A superb and inexpensive restaurant. Fine food expertly served by waitresses in appetizing forms. 

For sale: an antique desk suitable for lady with thick legs and large drawers. 

Now is your chance to have your ears pierced and get an extra pair to take home, too. 

Wanted: 50 girls for stripping machine operators in factory. 

Wanted: Unmarried girls to pick fresh fruit and produce at night. 

We do not tear your clothing with machinery. We do it carefully by hand. 

Great Dames for sale. 

Tired of cleaning yourself? Let me do it. 

Dog for sale: eats anything and is fond of children. 

Vacation Special: have your home exterminated. 

Mt. Kilimanjaro, the breathtaking backdrop for the Serena Lodge. Swim in the lovely pool while you drink it all in. 

The hotel has bowling alleys, tennis courts, comfortable beds, and other athletic facilities. 

Get rid of aunts: Zap does the job in 24 hours. 

Toaster: A gift that every member of the family appreciates. Automatically burns toast. 

Sheer stockings. Designed for fancy dress, but so serviceable that lots of women wear nothing else. 

Stock up and save. Limit: one. 

Man, honest. Will take anything. 

Man wanted to work in dynamite factory. Must be willing to travel. 

Used Cars: Why go elsewhere to be cheated? Come here first! 

Modular Sofas. Only $299. For rest or fore play. 

Wanted: Hair-cutter. Excellent growth potential. 

3-year-old teacher needed for pre-school. Experience preferred. 

Our experienced Mom will care of your child. Fenced yard, meals, and smacks included. 

Our bikinis are exciting. They are simply the tops. 

Auto Repair Service. Free pick-up and delivery. Try us once, you'll never go anywhere again. 

Illiterate? Write today for free help. 

Girl wanted to assist magician in cutting-off-head illusion. Blue Cross and salary. 

Semi-Annual after-Christmas Sale. 

We will oil your sewing machine and adjust tension in your home for $1.00. 


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