Humor! Humour!


America's funniest bumper stickers

My wife keeps complaining I never listen to her
...or something like that.

Keep honking while I reload.

If we are what we eat; I'm cheap, fast, and easy.

Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

I love cats ... they taste just like chicken.

Sorry, I don't date outside my species

Sometimes I wake up grumpy; Other times I let her sleep.

I want to die in my sleep like my grandfather... Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car ...

The gene pool could use a little chlorine.

I didn't fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian.

Your kid may be an honor student but you're still an IDIOT!

It's as BAD as you think, and they ARE out to get you.

Smile, it's the second best thing you can do with your lips.

When there's a will, I want to be in it!

Okay, who stopped the payment on my reality check?

My karma ran over my dogma.

He who laughs last thinks slowest.

Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.

Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.

Be nice to your kids. They'll choose your nursing home.

You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me.

BEER: It's not just for breakfast anymore.

I need someone really bad... are you really bad?

The more you complain, the longer God lets you live.

My kid had sex with your honor student.

Guns don't kill people, postal workers do.

God must love stupid people, he made so many.

I said "no" to drugs, but they just wouldn't listen.

Smile, it's the second best thing you can do with your lips.

Warning: I intentionally run over small, furry animals.

Eat Well, Stay Fit, Die Anyway

If you lived in your car, you'd be home by now

WARNING! Driver only carries $20.00 in ammunition

So Many Pedestrians - So Little Time.

If We Quit Voting, Will They All Go Away?

Some people are only alive because it is illegal to shoot them

5 days a week my body is a temple. The other two, it's an amusement park.


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